


read me to sleep

by rubanrose



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Romantic Soulmates, Soulmates, Telepathic Bond, soulmates meeting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-08
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 20:11:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9623573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubanrose/pseuds/rubanrose
Summary: Every day he hopes Jaehyun will let him meet him. Everywhere he goes, Doyoung looks for him, for his mysterious soulmate, for the one he loves, and for his best friend.Doyoung wants to hear his voice, loud and clear as Jaehyun stands in front of him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Mentions of Johnten and Taewin
> 
> I have not been into NCT for a long time, so pardon my characterization, I tried my best. Also, I wrote this pretty quickly and I probably missed a few typos and mistakes while I was editing it. Ignore them. Thank you

_ ‘Stop reading out loud.’ _

_ ‘You don't like French literature, hyung?’  _

_ ‘Read it in silence.’  _

_ ‘Block me out.’  _

_ ‘You know that's not possible and hearing you read in my head is very distracting. Stop sending your thoughts my way.’  _

_ ‘I want to share things with you.’ _

_ ‘What exactly are you trying to share with me here? Pain and misery?’ _

_ ‘I was going to say great knowledge, but that works too.’  _

_ ‘So, when are we meeting?’  _

“It’s so creepy when you makes those faces while you talk to him, it’s like you’ve gone mad,” Donghyuk says, sitting across from Doyoung at the dining table. The older boy almost scowl at him for interrupting his mental conversation, but he knows it’s over anyway. Jaehyun’s end is always silent for hours, days at most when he brings up meeting. 

“Shut up, Donghyuck. You’ll see what it’s like, when you turn 18,” Doyoung says, and Donghyuck rolls his eyes, as if he doesn’t believe it’ll happen to him. 

It’s impossible to know how strong a soulmate bond is, when you’re still young, still alone in your thoughts, unable to feel that constant pulling towards someone you don’t know, but feel like you know. 

It’s been almost 2 years since Jaehyun turned 18, and since Doyoung first heard him in his head. Once both soulmates are 18 years old, the bond finally forms. It was a few day after his nineteenth birthday. Doyoung waited for a year, with nothing ever disturbing his thoughts, but now he has a constant reminder there was someone for him, someone whom he is supposed to be in perfect harmony with but who he can’t even get to agree to meet him. 

Donghyuck quickly stands up. He leans down to kiss his little brother, strapped in his chair. The toddler grabs his shirt and the teenager has to unclench each of the boy’s fingers. Donghyuck’s brother hated to see him go. Doyoung isn’t the problem, Minhyuk likes his babysitter. He just loves his brother even more. 

“You’ll be back at 9?” Doyoung asks. Donghyuck nods, grabbing his bag by the door. 

“But mom will probably be home before that. She only works until 8 today.” 

Doyoung waves him goodbye but Donghyuck is already running, late for evening school his mom is working hard to pay for him. 

Doyoung finds himself alone with the three years old kid he babysits twice a week. The boy is playing with his cereals, his eyes shooting up towards the TV on the wall where talking, animated dogs are saving the city once again. 

Doyoung only watches the TV for about 12 seconds before his mind wanders to Jaehyun again, and he knows he has to try talking to him because the silence in his mind is driving him mad. 

_ ‘Jaehyun-ah. I won’t talk about it again. I’m sorry for pushing it, even though you told me not to. I hate this silence.’  _

There’s only silence answering on the other end. Doyoung picks up the dishes on the table and places them on the counter, letting warm water fill up the sink so he can wash them. 

Minhyuk in his chair blabbers half coherent sentences to the animated dogs, and Doyoung tries to smile at him, but he can’t. He’s only thinking of Jaehyun. 

_ ‘I’ve always wanted to read les miserables. What a great book.’  _ Doyoung tries again, and he laughs when it starts again, Jaehyun’s voice in his head, not acknowledging him, but reading to him. It doesn’t bother him this time, and as he washes the dishes he pays attention to how melodic Jaehyun’s voice sounds in the echoes of his mind, how his sentences flow nicely when he reads, pausing when he should, speaking clearly. Doyoung is hung on the way Jaehyun says the foreign names and the fancy words, the translation matching the original work. And if someone was to ask him what the book was about, he wouldn’t even know, but he could tell with precision the way Jaehyun pronounced every sound, each particularity he could pick out in his enunciation. 

Every day he hopes Jaehyun will let him meet him. Everywhere he goes, Doyoung looks for him, for his mysterious soulmate, for the one he loves, and for his best friend. 

Doyoung wants to hear his voice, loud and clear as Jaehyun stands in front of him. 

 

* * *

Not every pair of soulmates have a telepathic bond. 

Johnny can tell the exact second Ten will enter their apartment. Doyoung tested it out before, he counted the seconds on the clock, the 3 minutes and 47 seconds slowly ticking away, the door slamming open as the second hand on the clock ticks into place, just as Johnny said it would happen.

Johnny says there’s a string that connects their hands. It’s not truly a string, but a thread of light, going from one index finger to another, stretching when they aren’t together. They always know how far away the other is. When Johnny and Ten first met each other, Doyoung would bother his friend all day. How far was Ten now? How long would it take to get to him? Where is he exactly? Doyoung’s curiosity has no limits and Johnny can’t always answer him. He couldn’t precisely tell where Ten was, but he knew how far away he was, and he could always find him. 

Doyoung sometimes wishes Jaehyun and him had that kind of bond, so he could find him, so he could feel his existence. Sometimes Doyoung overthinks, and he wonders if he imagined him. If he imagined Jaehyun, and if the voice in his head isn’t really there. He holds onto small facts, like the books Jaehyun reads for him every night, real books that Doyoung has never read, sometimes never even heard about, but the sentences Jaehyun gently say as he soothes him to sleep are real, printed in books, word for word. He makes sure, once in awhile. Finds one of the books Jaehyun reads and makes sure it’s real. The books are real, and Doyoung has to come to the conclusion that Jaehyun is, too. 

He was impatient, his heart asked for Jaehyun every day. He knew the younger boy wasn’t ready to meet him, so he didn’t push it. In the end, it had to be Jaehyun’s choice. So he waited. 

There were other kinds of soulmate bonds, too. 

Sicheng and Taeyong had a skin bond. It meant everything on Taeyong’s skin would appear on Sicheng’s, and vice versa. From the moment Sicheng turned 18, both of them had their arms full of scribbles; small drawings, doodles, encouraging words and small hearts, all over their hands. Once, Taeyong wrote Sicheng a love letter on his forearm, and the younger boy who was always proud to show his friend everything he and Taeyong doodled on each other had worn long sleeves that day, keeping secret the words that were meant just for him. Doyoung never found out what exactly had been written there, but he knew Taeyong was good with words, and from the way Sicheng’s eyes never left him the next few days, smiling almost naively at him, he knew Sicheng was weak to Taeyong’s words. 

But everyday, that he was able to hear Jaehyun’s voice in his head, Doyoung was thankful. 

 

* * *

 

“There’s been no progress?” Taeyong asks as he sits down in front of Doyoung in one of the plastic chairs outside the convenience store, placing his ramen in front of him. 

Doyoung shakes his head. 

“He cuts me off when I ask him if we can meet, so I’ve been avoiding the subject lately. Going too long without hearing his voice is like torture,” admits Doyoung, and Taeyong shots him a sorry look. Johnny and Ten join them, taking the empty chairs. 

“You could probably find him one way or another,” Johnny says, and Doyoung immediately shakes his head. 

“I don’t want to force him if he’s not ready.” 

Ten stares at him. “How are you not turning mad?” he asks after a few seconds, and Doyoung laughs. 

He almost talks about how Jaehyun reads to him, about how falling asleep to his voice almost feels like being held in his arms. It feels too intimate to explain, so he keeps it to himself. 

“We talk a lot, at least.” Doyoung shrugs, bringing more ramen to his mouth, trying to ignore the way his heart pinched painfully at the thought of Jaehyun. 

_ ‘On my birthday. I’ll see you on my birthday.’  _

Doyoung drops his chopstick, his eyes widening. His friend watched him, stuck between wanting to laugh at his sudden reaction and worry for him. 

Doyoung yells as he jumps out of his chair. He’s jumping, running around with so much joy it overwhelms him and he can’t help but send it towards Jaehyun, all this joy and excitement. 

_ ‘Are you really this excited to see me?’  _

Doyoung can feel the laughter in Jaehyun’s voice. 

_ ‘Are you dumb or just completely oblivious?’  _ Doyoung retorts. 

He’s breathless from running around, from yelling, and when he finally calms down he picks up the chair that had fallen to the ground when he had gotten up and sits down. His friends are laughing, wondering what’s happening with him. 

“What day it is?” he asks, frantic, reaching for his phone. 

“The 9th,” Ten says, and Doyoung freezes. 

“Oh my god,” he says, and he leans back in his chair. “I’m seeing him in 5 days.” 

“For Valentines’ Day?” Taeyong asks. 

Doyoung frowns. He had forgotten. “It’s Jaehyun’s birthday.” 

Jaehyun’s birthday also meant it’s been 2 years exactly since they bonded. 

“Does anyone want to help me make chocolates?” he asks, and everyone laughs. Taeyong has to accept because no one else can actually make chocolates. Doyoung thanks him with a look. 

He would have to make Valentine’s Day, and Jaehyun’s birthday, the best night possible.

 

* * *

 

On the day before they meet, Jaehyun reads to him like any other day. Doyoung tries to listen to him, he tries to calm the frantic beats of his heart, but he keeps tossing around and around, unable to concentrate on Jaehyun’s words, unable to stop thinking so much. 

After an hour, Jaehyun stops. 

_ ‘Why can I still feel you awake? You usually fall asleep much faster.’  _

_ ‘I can’t stop thinking.’  _

_ ‘You’re trying to imagine my pretty face? Ah, don’t get ahead of yourself, hyung. When you meet me, you’ll have an actual reason to be thinking all night. I’m far more handsome than your greatest fantasies.’  _

Doyoung laughs, tucking the blanket under his chin. Even counting the fluorescent stars stuck on his ceiling hadn’t made him sleepy. 

_ ‘Stop being so cocky, what if I’m disappointed?’  _

Jaehyun’s melodic laugh travels through their bond, echoing in Doyoung’s mind. 

_ ‘Jaehyun-ah. Can I be the one to help you fall asleep tonight?’  _

There’s a short silence. Doyoung turns to his side, watching the bright red number on his alarm clock. 12:48AM. 

_ ‘Okay.’  _

Doyoung breathes sharply, trying to be brave enough. 

He sings out loud, because it’s easier than singing only in his mind. It’s his favourite ballad, and he meant to ask Jaehyun if he could sing it to him for months. 

It’s a weird feeling, to feel Jaehyun fall asleep. He can feel the connection between them weakens as Jaehyun’s mind begins its journey to dreamland. He can feel the wave of calm hitting him, slowly reaching to him. The silence on the other side is comforting in a way because Doyoung can still feel his soulmate, he can feel the tug on their bond. It isn’t a silence like when Jaehyun blocks him, when all he can feel is cold, as if a wall was between them. 

Doyoung feels his heartbeat slow. His words are slurred together, so he stops singing, and when he closes his eyes, sleep welcomes him. 

 

* * *

 

It's colder than what he expected. Doyoung stuffs his hands in his pocket, trying not to shiver as he looks around the unfamiliar neighbourhood, trying to find the store where Jaehyun asked to meet. He checks the directions he wrote down on a paper, not wanting to ask Jaehyun to help him. There’s been a weird silence between them, ever since they told each other good morning. 

The store ended up being a short distance away. Doyoung stood in front of the wooden door for a minute, trying to gather his courage. 

When he finally pushes the door, a bell announces his arrival. He feels the warm air of the book store infiltrating his clothes, warming up his cold skin. Doyoung scans the shelves of books, and suddenly it makes sense that Jaehyun asked him to come there. The air smells of new books, that smell you get when you first crack a book you just bought open. 

And when Doyoung looks up to the counter, he sees him behind the cash register, staring at him. There’s a name tag on his shirt, but Doyoung doesn’t need to read it to know who the boy is. 

_ Jaehyun.  _ He stares at Doyoung, biting his lip. Neither of them is saying a word, neither of them is moving. 

He looks beautiful. Jaehyun looks older than his age, his eyes show a certain maturity. He smiles at Doyoung, and dimples appear in his cheeks. Doyoung’s heart is beating so fast, he doesn’t know how to react. 

“You look like a Christmas elf,” Jaehyun says, and Doyoung lets out a nervous laugh.

“I can’t believe this is the first thing you say to me,” Doyoung comments. Jaehyun raise a hand, signaling for Doyoung to come closer.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Jaehyun says as Doyoung walks up to the counter. 

“Your voice is nice.” Doyoung’s voice is shaking. He places his arms on the counter for support because he doesn’t know how long his legs will hold the weight of his body. He feels light headed. “Why...why did you make me wait this long?” 

Jaehyun’s smile falls, and he places his hand over Doyoung’s only for a few seconds. It’s a kind gesture, small but reassuring, and it’s also the first time they touch. Doyoung stares at his hand, the warmth from Jaehyun’s hand hadn’t lasted long, but Doyoung feels as if his heart is on fire. 

“How about some tea?” Jaehyun asks, and Doyoung nods, following him to the back of the store. 

The room had seemed small at first, but as he walks through the bookshelves, he can see it stretches for much longer than he though. There are many sections with what seemed like an endless amount of books. At the back, there’s a small reading corner. A few chairs, a few small tables. Paper snowflakes are hung to the ceiling, fairy lights lining the walls. The atmosphere is almost magic, and Doyoung wonders if Jaehyun ever sat there while reading to him. 

Jaehyun disappears in the back store to boil some water while Doyoung takes off his coat and sits down, looking around in awe. When his soulmate comes back and sit in front of him, Doyoung’s attention goes back to him. He studies his face. 

They’re almost awkward, careful with each other, which is such a change from their mental conversations. 

“I wanted to graduate high school before I met you. So I wouldn’t feel like a dropout, like I’d given up.” 

Doyoung stares at him, his mind analyzing the new information.. “You know it wouldn’t have mattered to me. You’re a good person, Jaehyun. And that’s what’s important,” he says, finding his words again. He speaks with his heart. 

“It wasn’t really about you. It was about me. I wanted to be proud of myself, so you could be proud of me, too,” Jaehyun admits, and Doyoung smiles at him, waiting for him to continue. “I didn’t want to drop out of school, but my father died when I was 15, and my mother couldn’t take care of the store by herself. Not while she was mourning him, and not while she was taking care of everything else. So I took a break. I wasn’t giving up.” 

Doyoung reaches for his hand, tentatively. Jaehyun sees the gesture and opens his palm for him, tightening his fingers around Doyoung’s. 

“I went back when I turned 18, when we bonded and I couldn’t bear to think about meeting you in this situation. I’m sorry for making you wait so much,” Jaehyun apologizes, and Doyoung smiles at him. He can’t be mad at him, not when Jaehyun’s reason is so genuine and Doyoung can understand.

“Congratulations on your graduation. You should’ve told me, I would’ve gotten you flowers,” Doyoung says, and Jaehyun shakes his head, his eyes telling him his presence is enough. 

Jaehyun stands up to get the tea, and as he watches him leave Doyoung suddenly remembers what day it is, and the gifts in his bag. 

When Jaehyun comes back with a plate of cookies and two cups of tea, he seems to be glowing with happiness. 

“I have something for you,” Doyoung says, reaching for his bag. He takes the bag of chocolates, placing them in front of Jaehyun on the table. 

They don’t look great because Doyoung doesn’t have much skills. Taeyong helped him by sitting on the counter and giving him various advice, watching him suffer without moving an inch, but at least he was useful as moral support. 

“Happy Valentines Day. They’re edible, I swear,” Doyoung says, and Jaehyun picks up the bag, observing the chocolates with a smile. 

“Thank you,” he says genuinely, and it makes Doyoung blush because he didn’t expect Jaehyun to look this happy about chocolates that seemed like they’d been made by a kid. 

“And I have something else for you,” Doyoung admits, reaching into his bag again. This time, the gift is wrapped. He hands him the gift. "Happy birthday, Jaehyun."

“Why does everything you do looks like it’s been made by a toddler?” Jaehyun laughs when he sees how messily the gift had been wrapped up, with probably more tape than paper. Doyoung fakes hurt, his lips turning into a pout. 

“Apparently, you can’t wrap gifts with love,” he whined, and Jaehyun laughed. He tears the paper, revealing the leather cover of the book. 

He read out loud. “Murder on the Orient Express.” He questions Doyoung with his eyes. 

“Remember that night. It was a long time ago, a few weeks after we bonded. I was crying, and called out for you, and to help me calm down, you read this book to me. You read to me all night,” Doyoung explains, and Jaehyun nods, remembering. “It meant a lot to me, that night, and I felt much closer to you after. This is the nicest edition I found, and I wanted you to have it, so maybe one day you can read it to me out loud, next to me.” 

Jaehyun flips a few pages, finding the inscription Doyoung had left in the inside of the cover page. He puts down the book on the table, and Doyoung wants to take the gift back and say that he’s sorry, that it’s a stupid idea. 

But Jaehyun doesn’t let him the time. He stands up, walks to Doyoung side of the table, grabs his collar and places his lips on his before he has the time to react. 

And Doyoung thinks that it was worth it to wait 2 years. 


End file.
